A Command Performance
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Proverbs 13:12 (ESV)
When was the last time you experienced bitter disappointment? When was the last time you were excitedly looking forward to something and at the last moment your hopes were dashed? I had that experience recently when given an opportunity to sing before the Queen.
I have rehearsals on Tuesday with the choir, and although I had missed some practices being away from Birmingham, I knew the song and was able to run through it at the last session. As we were singing for the Monarch, we were reminded of the documents we were to carry and dress code for the event. The big day arrived. I wasn’t nervous. I knew I didn’t intend to be late, oversleep or leave anything behind, or to chance. As we approached the venue I must admit I did not feel too well from that walk, but I put it down to hidden/unacknowledged excitement maybe or just being unfit! My colleagues all talked about how each slept and their excitement. I was strangely calm and unaffected by it all.
At Grand Central Station I presented my ID only to be informed that they could not find my name on the register, and hence I would not be permitted to enter or take part with my fellow choir members. I was taken aback and my heart sank. I couldn’t believe it—so close to a dream come true and the door was shut in my face. The choir leader had not given me some vital information so I was excluded and not vetted. While she was apologetic, it still hurt. One hundred and one thoughts went through my head. A wave of emotions flooded my mind. However, I told her calmly that it was ok and walked away saying goodbye to a bewildered group.
In those moments I needed to make some decisions. I remained in the vicinity praying hopefully that God would sort it out. The answer: No. My friends were only a few yards away and God gave me the courage to stay and support them from behind the barrier with smiles and waves. I was still a part of the team and didn’t want to mar their experience, even though I wrestled with my feelings of being alone, rejected, overlooked and feeling I was not missed.
I stayed for the whole performance and after all the proceedings I went inside to greet them and share with them how awesome they sounded. I wanted them to care about what had occurred but not pity me. I didn’t want them to feel obliged to not show their excitement and awe about something unique and wonderful that they had just experienced. So, embracing their euphoria was agonising but I knew that God helped me through it. I really wanted them to do well and they did.
There are so many lessons from this latest episode in my life. Even when the plan doesn’t come together, remember to trust God, talk with Him and count your blessings. Also, don’t take life’s many opportunities for granted. I am a little wiser from missing out.
God also has a sense of humour. I said to someone at work the day before the event that the real highlight for me would to be to sing before the King of Kings. Thankfully, I can do that whenever I want without being vetted. Thank you God!
Loving Father, help us never to lose our voice and to continually sing your praises in the good and bad times. In Jesus’ name we pray.
Study by Maureen Watson
Worldwide Church of God Birmingham
All Saints Church
BIRMINGHAM B23 7QB
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